New words for a new millenium, Episode #1

One of the things I like to do recreationally is to find words that describe something heretofore not perfectly encapsulated in the existing lexicon (and just re-reading that sentence it's a wonder that I feel the need to).

For many years, my sister lived in South Yarra. She was delightfully close to Chapel Street (if you like that sort of thing) and we spent a lot of time sleazing down there for ice cream and the like in summer. And this is when we came across an opportunity to add to the English language a new collective noun. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you

"PUBE"


Pube (noun)

Collective noun for a group of teenage boys wearing latest fashion polo shirts, exhibiting excessive hair-style products and a hanging fug of aftershave or cologne

Pube (anthropological)

Pubes are often to be found roaming Chapel Street throughout the summer wearing the latest fashion sunglasses and tight jeans. Pubes behave in a loud and aggressive manner and show scant regard for the authority of other groups or individuals.

Well into the winter months, multiple pubes will appear in socially desirable locations without changing their appearance save a coating of goose-bumps due to lack of adequate clothing. The interaction of distinct pubes can sometimes be difficult, particularly when individual pube members are intoxicated. Warring pubes will often clash in the streets causing disruption to traffic and local harmony. Members of a pube will often travel together, squeezed into cars which feature exceedingly loud stereo systems and flashing lights


Pube (public warning)

If you see a pube, do not approach. When provoked, they may become belligerent and aggressive, believing as they do that they are immortal, the world revolves around them and you are merely a speck on the windscreen of their lives, eh.