A recipe for a "get-along scene"

I turned on the television the other night (I think it was a Sunday, but it’s hard to be sure), and heard a familiar song, one played to me frequently as a child by my hippy-music-loving parents.

The song was “Melting Pot” by Blue Mink (although wrongly attributed to Boyzone, Culture Club and a variety of other cover versions). Here are the lyrics of the original song:

Take a pinch of white man
Wrap him up in black skin
Add a touch of blue blood
And a little bitty bit of red Indian boy*

Oh like a Curly Latin kinkies**
Oh Lordy, Lordy, mixed with yellow Chinkees***, yeah
You know you lump it all together
And you got a recipe for a get along scene
Oh what a beautiful dream
If it could only come true,
you know, you know

What we need is a great big melting pot
Big enough enough enough to take
The world and all its got
And keep it stirring for a hundred years or more
And turn out coffee coloured people by the score

Rabbis and the friars
Vishnus and the gurus
We got the Beatles or the Sun God
Well it really doesn't matter what religion you choose

And be thankful little Mrs. Graceful
You know that livin' could be tasteful
We should all get together in a lovin machine
I think I'll call up the queen
It' s only fair that she knows, you know, you know

What we need is a great big melting pot
Big enough enough enough to take
The world and all its got
And keep it stirring for a hundred years or more
And turn out coffee coloured people by the score

Now notwithstanding the extreme (and I mean EXTREME) hippy factor of the lyrics, it’s a Boomer generation anthem of multiculturalism and tolerance. It reached #3 in the UK charts.

So what the hell is it doing as an advertisement for FREAKING MAGGI FLAVOUR BASES?????

They have had to alter it a bit, but instead of paying some struggling singer to re-record it, they have just EDITED OUT THE BITS THEY DIDN’T LIKE. For example, they wanted to include a reference to whatever god-awful excuse-for-a-curry powder they included, so they just blanked out the “red” in the Indian line. WHO DOES THAT????

I’m also wondering who the target market for this advertisement is, exactly? If my parents are anything to judge (boomers) by, they won’t be inspired to run out and buy a 60 cent sachet of powder on the strength of this song. And meanwhile it’s not like it inspires any kind of warm feeling for anyone under the age of 50.

What’s next –

Neil Sedaka’s ‘Breaking up is hard to do’ as a Family Relationships Centre jingle?

Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech used to spruik bedding products?

Whoever it was in the Maggi Kingdom who thought they were being oh-so-clever…you weren’t. You are ruining my childhood memories with your foolish interpretation that the ONLY THING WE NEED TO DO TO ACHIEVE CULTURAL HARMONY IS TO EAT MAGGI PRODUCTS.

* penny drops *

Of course.

Why didn’t we think of this earlier?

SOME ONE GET THAT ADVERTISING EXEC A SPOT ON THE UNITED NATIONS, THIS MINUTE.

I'm looking at YOU, John Howard.


* don't be tricked into thinking that "red Indian" is an acceptable usage here

** or "kinkies" here.

** or "chinkees" here for that matter. They were trying, people. And it was the 60s.